We've all been there at one point or another in life. It's after midnight and a hankering for a milkshake happens. Making one could be doable, provided the fridge and freezer are stocked with milk and ice cream. but the cleanup's not worth it, especially if a McDonald's is right around the corner. It's much simpler to hop in the car and do the drive thru for that milkshake.
For most of us, this would be an uneventful yet satisfying experience. For Josh Raby, his 1 a.m. trip to McDonald's for a milkshake would turn into a hilarious story, one that has gone viral.
"Hey holy shit hello, you are at McDonald's, and I am begging your patience."— Josh Raby (@JoshRaby) April 11, 2016
So I sit for a minute, then he finally returns and says "please tell me your order"— Josh Raby (@JoshRaby) April 11, 2016
So I say "milkshake"
I don't know why that's all I said
He is gone for several minutes. When he returns he says flatly "we aren't going to be able to do the milkshake. I do have many apple pies."— Josh Raby (@JoshRaby) April 11, 2016
"I am not ok. Would you please tell me your order so I can try to punch it in? I will be very slow, but I will get it."— Josh Raby (@JoshRaby) April 11, 2016
My chicken sandwich order confuses him. Several minutes are spent repeating what I want on it, watching the screen as he tries over and over— Josh Raby (@JoshRaby) April 11, 2016
"I'm sorry, man, I-"— Josh Raby (@JoshRaby) April 11, 2016
"Please describe your chicken sandwich to me again so I can succeed at one thing."
"Fine. I will buy an apple pie."— Josh Raby (@JoshRaby) April 11, 2016
"Apple pies are cheaper than milkshakes anyway."
"Ok, thanks"
"What? Who did you find?"— Josh Raby (@JoshRaby) April 11, 2016
"MY WIFE. SHE WAS WATCHING ME FROM BEHIND THE BOXES!"
"Can you give me my total" I say because honestly I don't know if I want to understand his marriage or if I even could and I just want to go— Josh Raby (@JoshRaby) April 11, 2016
"What is the discount?"— Josh Raby (@JoshRaby) April 11, 2016
"2 apple pies for only 2 dollars. You should take it."
(Note: One apple pie is $1.19)
I pull around and they are fucking making out in the window and he has his thumb out like he is aware I will be driving up to this— Josh Raby (@JoshRaby) April 11, 2016
They unstick themselves from one another and I hand him my card "sorry about this. I haven't worked at McDonald's in 16 years" he says— Josh Raby (@JoshRaby) April 11, 2016
His wife cackles and says "I knew that when I was 13, get with it, man!"— Josh Raby (@JoshRaby) April 11, 2016
I have been here 37 minutes.
So listen I get my card and drive ahead to the next window and THERE IS A WHOLE SEPARATE FUCKING HUMAN AT THAT WINDOW— Josh Raby (@JoshRaby) April 11, 2016
Since the Twitter tale began circulating, newspapers and online sites have run with the story, some actually contacting McDonalds to verify Raby's version of the story.My chicken sandwich was wrong, by the way— Josh Raby (@JoshRaby) April 11, 2016
Instead of harassing him, everyone should be thanking him for an entertaining moment away from the Trump clown show, the Cruz sex scandal, Hillary's emails, and #FeelTheBern thoughts.HOUSE OF CARDS SHIT IS HAPPENING IN MY MESSAGE REQUEST FOLDER RIGHT NOW pic.twitter.com/QISqXDNpT2— Josh Raby (@JoshRaby) April 11, 2016
To all the online publications asking me to confirm this dumb story I respectfully submit the following pic.twitter.com/arDMusgUwi— Josh Raby (@JoshRaby) April 11, 2016
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